National Bird

As the Fourth of July approaches, many fireworks stands appear along the roadsides. One near our house features an enormous blow-up American eagle with an American flag-draped body.
"Look, Drew!"
"Oooh, it's a seahawk! Wearing pajamas!"

Did He Use a Slide Rule For That?

Drew wandered inside to take Mike's handheld video game to him. When he came back outside, I asked him if Mike had appreciated Drew's bringing it to him.
Drew replied, "According to my calculations...yes."

Red blooded

While out at dinner tonight, Drew looks at me and says "What up? That's hello in American."

I am as always, speechless

Screaming Strawberry Mama

While at my parents' house last week, I bit into a just-picked strawberry, and an earwig crawled out. It freaked me out so much, I ran around the house screaming for several minutes, which in turn scared Drew, who was watching a movie with my mom in the other room.

Later, mom and Drew had resumed their movie when he turned to her and said "You know, this never would have happened if you hadn't planted those strawberries."

A few minutes after that, dad and I were laughing heartily at something or other. Apparently we could be heard in the other room, because Drew looked at my mom, threw up his hands in exasperation, and blurted, "What now?!"

On Boobies

I got out of the shower, and Drew said "What are those pointy things on your boobies, mom?"
"Ummm...nipples?"
"What are those for?"
"Well, one theory is...they fed you until you were about 14 months old."
"Huh."
We then discussed the supply and demand theory of breastfeeding. He asked appropriate questions, and I tried to reply thoughtfully. After a while, he said, "Okay, mom. That's enough boobie talk."